Murder Me Not!

 

Maria Simoes of Pindobacu, Bahia, Brazil, thought her husband was having an affair with Iranildes Araujo, and allegedly paid Carlos de Jesus about US $550 to kill her. When de Jesus saw Araujo, however, he discovered she was a childhood friend, and told her about the plot. They came up with a plan to convince Simoes that Araujo was dead. “I tore my own top, I stuck the knife in my side,” she said. “He tied me up and smothered me with tomato ketchup.” They sent a picture to Simoes to show the “murder” and she paid the hitman’s fee. But the scheme unraveled when Simoes saw the couple in town. Amazingly, Simoes went to the police to report she had been conned. Now all three are facing charges, though de Jesus has skipped town. Meanwhile, Simoes is a laughing stock (“Did she really not notice that the knife was stuck in the armpit?” laughed one local), and Araujo is now so popular, she’s a shoo-in to be elected to the town council, the mayor says. Araujo says she’s considering it.

A THOUGHT: Especially now that she knows how to fend off assassination attempts.