"Handy Wipes Please!"

A 35-year-old man was given a summons by police after a woman said he drove up alongside her at the Colonial Commons Shopping Center in Harrisburg, Pa., in his minivan — and she could see his pants were down around his knees. When he saw that she had noticed, he nodded, she said. He has been charged with indecent exposure and “open lewdness,” and it is noted that he has prior, similar arrests. His name: Handy Wood.

  
A THOUGHT: I wouldn’t have been surprised if his name was Handy Wipes.